the “sacred grail of youth”

Prue Stent

sacred grailletter to my friend

“Aging as if you haven’t aged at all doesn’t simply expose us to a standardized idea of beauty. It is a narrative that actively prevents us from understanding beauty in forms that do not correspond to the youthful canon. Consequently, the more we chase the Sacred Grail of youth, the more we blackout aging bodies, the less we see them, the less we can appreciate them.”

different forms 

So says, Abigail T. Brooks, who Stefania Medetti interviewed for her wonderful blog, The Age Buster. See more here.

The interview is so dense with ideas, that I got one of my “buzzes” from it. It’s that buzz you get when you find almost too many things you want to follow-up on. But I’ve picked out a couple of ideas here, ideas I’ve been thinking about, and probably you have to.

Appreciating different forms of beauty is something I believe in, in almost a religious way.

I actually think that being able to appreciate different forms of beauty is a part of what might save the world. 

I don’t know when it was that I first realized my fixation on the beauty of an espresso machine and how, to most people, that was a bit odd. It was then that I became aware that there was something to this sensibility, this skill, this “eye” I possess. But it was a quick ego check when I found others who had the same skill. 

And then it was a hallelujah, I’m not alone!

getting it

So there were those people who “got it,” but then there were those who seemed absolutely incapable of getting it. You know some of those people, they’re the people who wrinkle up their noses when you point out the beauty of a rusted old building, hanging in the twilight of the cityscape.

They just can’t understand what anyone would see in the round, “lady bumps” of a

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a woman needs a man…

big things

a woman needs

I’ve said it before, I love tights, and my favorite are Heist. But when I saw this print, by Swedish Stockings, I decided to give them a try.

Although I’ve been railing about the excess of animal prints in fashion, for how many years now, I do like a little pussy cat in my life. And because tights are a part of my winter “look,” leopard tights are a logical addition.

As far as sustainability goes, here’s what the people at Swedish Stockings say:

“We create our pantyhose from both pre and post-consumer nylon waste. The production process is a lot less harmful to the environment than traditional nylon production and we are consistently looking for innovative and cleaner ways to produce – conserving or reusing water, decreasing emissions, reducing and recycling waste.”

big things

I’m going back to Latvia for three weeks, flying in on Christmas Eve. For some unfathomable reason, I can’t remember why I chose this, we’re staying in a fifth floor walk-up. Why this apartment?

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alright millennial

Patrick Duffy

alright millennial
global fashion exchange
baubles bangles and beads

I’m almost over the “ok boomer” thing, almost. Like most “things” these days you’re practically forced to pay attention to them, and when it’s something like “ok boomer,” give it some thought. And my thought is alright millennial.

Just to make things easier, I’m using the term “millennial” here to stand in for all generations coming after boomers. I’m well aware that there are differences between every generation and that the differences are important.

Also, no generation is monolithic, and we should all acknowledge that. But demographics tells us that there are some, widespread similarities between the people in any given generation.

For those of you like me, who forget the exact years associated with the generations, here’s a graphic to remind you. Apparently, no women were born in these eras according to the blog Kasasa? (Insert hand to forehead emoji here.)

First, a “confession.” Generally speaking, I like millennials, and I also like Gen Z and Gen X.

Let’s just say I like the youth, and unlike many other anti-ageism activists, I don’t even have a big problem with “ok boomer.” Mostly, and except of course, when it affects me directly, funny how it works that way. 

*Read a good, short, anti ageism activist’s post here, on Ashton Applewhite’s blog, including my comment.

But alright millennial, there is one instance, when a blanket dismissal of the boomer generation, by those of a younger one, is to be examined very closely indeed. 

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is advanced style advanced?

 Kathleen Ryan

is advanced style advanced
kathleen ryan
esquivel, american made shoes


Is the style known as Advanced Style, the term coined by Ari Seth Cohen, advanced? Is it “over the top,” as some have always believed? Perhaps Advanced Style is simply what it’s always been, a cohort of like-minded women, and men, who like to dress what might be called, “extravagantly?”

Is Advanced Style advanced?

This is what I’ve been thinking about ever since I had a very interesting talk, with a young man, in a coffee shop. He complimented my style, and then we proceeded to talk about what we both “did;” he worked in an art gallery, me, I’m a blogger.

Then we got around to the women of New York and the women of Advanced Style, a perfectly logical transition for this sophisticated town, and besides, we both know some “AS” proponents.

And then this stylish, young man told me he thought the whole Advanced Style thing was kind of “sad.” And I have to admit, I was more than a bit taken aback.

The Advanced Style is not monolithic,

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